“A computer is like an Old Testament god, with a lot of rules and no mercy”


Tuesday, May 5

Top 10 Scifi Guns

Throughout my infatuation with all things science fiction, one of the big draws for me has always been the tech. And what better tech is there than things that blow other things up?

Here's my top 10 list of the best sci-fi guns ever.

10. Logan's Run: This gun wasn't that great in application, but it sure made up for it with futuristic looks. Let's face it, it's an icon just because if you've seen the movie, you'll recognize this gun.


9. Gene Simmons' gun from Runaway: This gun was horribly ugly, but it had one really cool feature - the bullets tracked. Called "smart bullets", all you had to do was point and shoot. Sadly, he still couldn't hit Tom Selleck. It was probably the mustache.


8. Gatling gun from Predator: Yeah, I know. This is a real gun, but it is still way too cool. Seeing the future governor of Minnesota mow down a jungle was definitely one of the movie's highlights.


7. The Fembot "Guns": Austin Powers completely parodied so many other great movies, that it became great in it's own right, but my favorite scene was the Fembots. I always did like girls of that 'caliber'.


6. The Stormtrooper Carbine: This one would probably be higher on the list if it had been the least bit accurate. Even the heroes couldn't hit the broad side of a Death Star with one. Just look how long it took Princess Leia to kill those guards while stuck on that ledge. Why they bothered to put a scope on those things is beyond me.


5. Battlestar Galactica Blaster: As much as I loved the reboot of BSG, the guns were just too realistic to make my list. They looked too good, if you know what I mean, not clunky and futuristic and stuff. Not so the one from the original show. It was clunky, huge, and very flashy.


4. Space 1999 gun: This is probably the most unusual of all the guns here. Very similar in function to Star Trek's phaser, its looks are what set it apart. This was a classic of design and function. I had a watergun model of one of these as a kid and loved it.


3. Star Trek Phaser Type II: One of the most iconic of all sci-fi ray guns, the Phaser was a testament to design. It not only was practical as a ray gun, it doubled as a portable heater. The new designs for the movie took their cues from this one as well.


2. Han Solo's Blaster: What kid didn't have one of these growing up? This was and still is one of the coolest sci-fi pistols ever. And the best part? It was totally made up of spare parts. This is the reason Broomhandle Mausers are so collectible today.


1. Decker's gun from Blade Runner: While not a ray gun, this one skates to #1 on looks and chutzpah. Is it an automatic or a revolver? Yes, yes it is. It's not just a gun, it's a freakin' cannon. And besides, #1 and #2 were both wielded by Harrison Ford, so it has to be bad-a$$!

12 comments:

Joe Allen said...

No Firefly guns?

Mad Man said...

You know, I totally zoned on those.

Sadly, I just watched Serenity again this last weekend. Mal's sidearm would totally bump Logan's gun off the list. I'd probably put it at #4 just for it's cool looks.

Joe Allen said...

And, of course, there's Vera!

I can't disagree with any of your choices - they're all cool - but none have their own name!

Robb Allen said...

No M41-A pulse rifle?

Anonymous said...

Personally, I'm holding out for a phased plasma rifle in the forty megawatt range.

--Wes S.

Anonymous said...

Re: #5 The reason the new BSG guns look 'too realistic' is because they're modified versions of this:
https://www.berettausa.com/e2wItemMain.aspx?parentID=IT00006123

Mikee said...

The Zorg Corporation blasters from Fifth Element. Not only do they have the nonlethal net option, they have 3000 rounds that follow wherever the first aimed round is sent. Then there is the flamethrower and all the other oldi but goodie Zorg favorites, like the grenade launcher. Just don't get curious about the little button on the base of the gun.

Mad Man said...

Robb: The pulse rifle was cool, but it just wasn't in my top 10.

Anon: Thanks for the info!

Mikee: Yeah, I definitely considered that one, but the one from Runaway edged it out for me. As far as I know, that gun was the first scifi one with the tracking bullets.

Skekis said...

The original fembot.

From The Tenth Victim.

Word verification: bitard (?)

Mad Man said...

Interesting. I've never even heard of that film. I'll have to see if I can scrounge up a copy of it. Thanks for the information!

Anonymous said...

I saw some really good choices, but you missed a few important ones: Judge Dredd Lawgiver, Stargate SG-1 Zat'nik'atel (Zat Gun), Andromeda - High Guard Force Lance. But the best weapons ever are planet and sun killers: The Deathstar Super Laser, and Andromeda's High Guard Nova Bombs.

jeffreyC said...

The idea that the Star Wars Stormtrooper guns are inaccurate is based on:
1. The Stormtroopers who were missing on purpose, they were ordered to let the rebels escape so they could track them back to the base with the tracking device on the Millennium Falcon.
If they didn't escape they couldn't be tracked.
The Stormtroopers were so loyal that they allowed themselves to be killed in order to make it look more convincing.
2. The Princess/Senator who had little to no experience firing weapons, Luke and Chewbacca might have had more experience but with other weapons, Han was the only one trained with one.

It would have been much cooler if the Logan's Run Sandman gun had followed the book, in the book it had six very different loads that could be selected.